Tag Archives: exercise

lesson learned

about a year ago i bought a pair of pants

nothing special. just my favourite brand of black jeans

they were my “goal” pants

i purposely bought them a couple sizes smaller than what i was

these pants were my motivation – my end goal

they hung in my closet patiently waiting for me to get in to them already

these pants barely made it past my thighs

they definitely didn’t get past my hips never mind actually buttoning up

this morning in my 5am just woke up haze – i went and grabbed a pair of pants for work – threw them on
and they felt a little snug

what?

no way my regular pants would feel so “form fitting”

and that is when i realized i grabbed the wrong pair

and there i was in my “goal” pants. buttoned and zippered up

they battled my thighs and won!!!

i was in awe

sure – they were tight. *ahem* perhaps painted on tight

but damn they fit!!!!!!!!

and so i went to work with a perma smile

i was in my goal pants!!!!!!!

but the more the day passed…the more uncomfortable i was

i felt like a piggy in a blanket

i felt bigger than i ever have in my whole life!!!!

i finally pulled out my white flag – and unbuttoned the pants – right there at my desk
and let my poor little sausage roll belly breathe

it’s not total defeat
i mean they got on. they were comfortable in the morning
where as i have never ever been able to get them past my hips

so that’s a fucking win

but

i learned a lesson today

just because something fits – doesn’t mean you should wear it

here’s to hoping that next year – i will have to give them away because they are just too big

in the mean time i will just hang out in my yoga pants

they never judge
and never ever make me feel like a sausage roll

cheers

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injured

yup
it’s true

i’m an injured bee

i am not sure what happened
but an old injury has decided to come up and bite me in the ass

if you have read my blog
you will know
that i quit running after i got hit by a car
(actually a couple of cars but whose counting)

so many years later i picked up running again
to find myself far away from home
with debilitating pain in my shins

shin splints

they are not for the weak

so i researched how to treat this and was doing well
and then i sprained my ankle and was out of commission for a good year – no joke

since the weather has been unusually nice in my parts
i have been loving getting outdoors for long walks

at first my shins would hurt for the first 10-15 min
and then the pain would disappear
the other night i did a 5k – at a slower pace than usual
because my shins hurt pretty much until i got back home

it was an excruciating walk

i wondered if it could be my shoes
but they are new – and i was fitted for them
so it can’t be that

i guess this old injury has reared it’s nasty head
and that my friends
makes for a very sad bee.

they don’t hurt at all when i am walking casually
it’s just when i pick up my pace
and any slight incline is enough to make me cry

they recommend
not walking for 6-8 WEEKS!
WHAT!!!!!

i cannot do that
but if i don’t do that – i apparently will make it worse
so what am i to do?

my body is literally itching
to get my runners on and go go go
but i don’t know if i should

and really why bother
if i can only go at a normal non sweaty pace?

*insert big fat dramatic sigh here*

it really sucks
because i am going away in a month
and i figured – another month of exercising
may help me drop a couple of pounds
and make me feel a little bit more comfortable in my skin

oh well

i might throw in a Shaun T work out
and see how my legs handle that

woe is me

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i’m a freak

walking out my front door at 6am
and coming back through it at 9 sometimes 10pm
doesn’t give me much time for anything

this has been my life for about 2 months
mostly this past month

work is insane
and i think i am going insane

i can barely get my butt to bed
never mind working out

add to that the element of comfort eating
and well
it’s not pretty

today i decided
work be damned…
and left the office after my normal 8 hour day

i needed a break
i needed time away from there

and i also reallllly needed a bowl of chips to snack on

i decided to drive home
and said to myself
“self….
if you want to snack on chips tonight, you have to walk to the store
and then take the long way back home”

it’s December
it’s windy and cold
and i tend to not go outdoors unless i absolutely have to between November – April

but i wanted those chips

so i bundled myself up
and off i went

wow
who knew something unhealthy
would motivate me to do something healthy?
i assure you, if i were out of lettuce…i’d never leave the house

so 5kms later
i was home, with a bag of chips
chips i have zero interest in snacking on by the way

i got home and turned on the satellite radio
and one of my favourite songs came on

all of a sudden, i am off my couch
dancing around like an idiot

see, this white girl has no rhythm
but i didn’t care
i had the house to myself
i could flop around like a moron all i wanted
no one would know

except the dogs
i am sure they were judging me

next thing i know
a half hour passes
and i am sweating and feeling so freaking amazing

i have been so wound up
so over the top stressed
my body needed this release!!

i just haven’t had any time to be physical
at all

my life is not going to calm down any time soon
but what i learned tonight
is that i need some me time

thanks to NK – for making me see
that if i don’t take time to take care of myself
i can’t take care of what needs to be done

you dear sir
are the reason i danced my zero rhythm ass off

here’s to hoping
that i can get out there again
without chips being my reward

hey it’s a start
but you gotta start somewhere

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all a girl needs

is a brand new pair of sexy shoes

(my definition of sexy has changed as i have gotten older lol)

 

last May i went and got fitted for the perfect runners.

i took up running again after 20 years…and my 7 year old runners didn’t cut it

seems my body didn’t want to run as much as my brain wanted to
i had some bad shin splintsi mean crying kinda bad.

so i went and bought a beautiful pair of runners.

170 bucks later…i hit the pavement

my legs felt better…but i will still in a lot of pain.

i got to wear them twice…and then life happened.

i was in the middle of buying a house, packing…moving

all that fun stuff.

once i got settled in to the new house…
i sprained my ankle.  badly.

i gave up on the idea of running…never mind running.  i couldn’t even walk.

almost a year later…and my ankle is still not right.

anyway

once i moved….
my shoes were nowhere to be found
actually…a whole box of shoes…were missing.
somehow they got lost in the move…
just one box.
of course the box with all my most favourite shoes.
you know, the hoochie mamma shoes, work shoes
and these beautiful running shoes i just bought.

i was soooooo very sad.

for my birthday in December, a couple of my wonderful friends got me a gift card
so i could buy a pair of the shoes i lost.i was sooooo happy 🙂

4 months later…i went and purchased said shoes.

they were last years shoe…and so they were almost 50% off.

i bought my new pair of shoes for $1.70.

seriously…it can’t get better than that.

so now i have the shoes

i just need my legs to work
🙂
thank you lovely friends for the gift card!
and here are the sexy beasts
shoes

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couch to 5k

i won’t even go into why i haven’t been here
other than i have been extremely busy with some things…and sedentary with other things

as you can imagine
i am tired of excuses.

not that i am not busy…because i am…

i’ve been struggling to find the time to go to the gym
you know, the one that is two seconds away from my home.

but the truth is…

wait for it…

i don’t like the gym.

the gym feels like a chore.
it doesn’t thrill me or excite me
it makes me dread working out.

i realized i was happiest working out at home or going for my long 5k walks

i realized i am introverted even in my work outs.
i just want to be alone.

i wanted to do something different than just walk…
i enjoy walking but i wanted to push myself more
wanted to burn more calories and feel my body burn
call me weird…but i love that feeling

so i started to run.

if you haven’t read my blog before let me fill you in on why this is a huge deal.

i stopped running many many years ago

dare i say 20?

i used to run.
all the time.

i would wake up at a god awful hour in the morning and go for a run

i loved it.

then i got hit by a car…and it was game over.

i never attempted running again, only because i have been terrified.

see, even sprinting across the street can cause my ankles to lock and make me fall flat on my face.
scary indeed

but something told me to try.

and i did.

i was completely overwhelmed…

it felt amazing, i felt amazing…

am i outta shape?  my god yes.
but not for long
and hey, i have yet to fall on my face (give it time, it’s bound to happen…and i am sure in front of a huge crowd of people, cause that’s how i roll)

i have this awesome app on my phone that tells me what to do
when to run and when to walk
i play my awesome music that makes me want to move

i am alone…in my head…
and on my way to getting fit

i can’t walk right now

i can’t get up off the couch without groaning

but it’s a good pain.
a great pain actually.

i can’t wait to get out there again.
and again.

i think i found my mojo!

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finding myself

umm hi
remember me?

i have a blog – you know – about health and weight loss

let me tell you something.

i’ve been lost.
so very lost

i haven’t seen the inside of the gym since last February, although i see it every single day from the outside.

i’ve had good intentions.  honestly.

but truth be told…i’ve been bummed out.

alot has happened…and i let negativity get the best of me.

i’ve been through some serious life changes.  lost some people that meant the world to me.
so i decided…not to care.
it wasn’t a conscious decision.
i think it was…
i just couldn’t move.

it was easier to sit on my couch and feel badly.
because it almost felt wrong feeling good.

i’ve maintained pretty well considering.

obviously i’ve gained some weight – and i feel so sluggish and blah it’s unbelievable.
but i still fit into my clothes.

let me tell you something.  just because you fit into your clothes – doesn’t mean you should be wearing them.

it’s an all consuming thing…this thing that i am living through.
i hate feeling poorly…and yet i contribute to it daily.

i forget sometimes that i have people in my life that love me unconditionally…just the way i am.

how is it that i let those that love me with conditions affect me more than those that love for exactly who i am?

*sigh*

it’s true…my time is limited.  i don’t know where i could possibly fit in the gym these days.
and so it’s easier to just sit here
and feel badly about it.

i have motivation – somewhere in there

i’ve got all the work out dvd’s i could ever want.

and i have good intentions…and a gym right next door.

i’ve let this thing hurt me more than it should.

i’m actually letting it win – by not doing anything about it.

it is what it is…and it’s not going to change.
it’s a new chapter in my life i gotta get used to living.

it’s just hard when people you love – stop loving you.
it changes you.

besides, wordpress renewed my domain without giving me any notice…so i have a year to fill this space up.
so sadly – you are stuck with me.

truth is…i want me back
i want to feel comfortable in my skin again

i want to feel healthy and energetic…and ok.

i’ve let all this crap affect me for way too long – that i can’t use it as an excuse anymore.

i just need help.

just wanted to come here to let you all know – that i am on my way
i am coming back…

if i don’t – evil wins

and i am better than that

better than them.

help me find my mojo?


//

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could this be true

am i actually blogging???

hi!

remember me?

no?

meh, i don’t blame you.

i’ve been busy.  crazy busy.  so busy that i’ve let this place go.

let’s see…what’s new

everything and nothing.

the gym has been non existent, the eating has been pretty good…except for the random splurge on weekends.

i did acquire another bundle of joy.
a puppy.

so really – i am getting quite a bit of exercise.  i am actually more exhausted these days then when i actually had time for the gym.

i don’t settle in till at least after 8 – and then by 10 – i am walking the critters again. to say i am exhausted is an understatement.

i am sure i am burning a million calories with this heat wave.  it is hot over here…you break out in a sweat just breathing.
So for those of you that think Canadians live in igloos – oh think again my friends….think again.

did i mention LB is in a cast with a broken finger?….so yeah things are just insanely busy.
i may just cry things are so busy

i have two more days until i am on vacation.  it’s a staycation – but i am so looking forward to it.

so that’s pretty much my news.

what’s new with you?

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decisions, decisions

my life has changed a lot in the past few months.
to actually tell you how it’s changed?  well i can’t. lol

i am not too sure what has changed, or why suddenly it feels like i have no time to myself.

i am pretty much go-go-go until the dinner dishes are washed – which is normally well after 7.

by the time i am able to sit and chill – it’s after 8.

by then – i am just dead.  absolutely exhausted.

it also seems that that is the only window of opportunity i have to go to the gym.

right after work just doesn’t fit into my life anymore.
i have too much to do and not enough time to do it.

believe me, i’ve looked at different scenarios – and nothing seems to fit.

so i am debating whether i should quit the gym.

for the past few months all i’ve done is pay them.

i could go after 8 – but by that point i’ve checked out…i am so completely done with the day.

i can’t even imagine willingly getting on a cardio machine.

but it seems like that is my only option and one that i am not overly thrilled about.

oh – i know there’s the morning…but i can’t even get out of bed on time for work, never mind waking up at 5 to work out.
it just doesn’t work in my life.  me and the morning are not friends.
there is no point in denying that i am just not a morning person.

and so – what to do what to do?  do i just cancel the gym – or kick myself in the ass and go after 8?

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totally got an ass kickin’

there was no hula hooping, zumba-ing, trampolining done this week.

i think that inhaling and exhaling took more effort than anything.

i got knocked on my ass something fierce…

i came down with something on Tuesday.  it started with an annoying tickle in my throat – and then it felt like i swallowed razor blades – and someone was sitting on my chest,
to some god awful head cold turned to flu.

Thursday – was a hot day.  i do believe it was 31 degrees with the humidex.  i took a scalding hot bath, put on my fat pants, t-shirt, sweatshirt and blanky – and i was still shaking i was so cold.
i actually contemplated turning on the fire place…but it just felt wrong. lol

and then it decided to turn into a full on head cold – again.

of course i was sick.  i had a very important event to attend over the weekend – i’ve been waiting months to go – of course i would get my ass whipped.
i expected nothing less.

but i made it.  na-na-na-na-na you stupid cold – you didn’t win.

i feel much more myself today.  sure i can’t breathe and i am coughing up a lung – but i feel worlds better.

i decided to go grocery shopping, then go out and totally clean my nasty car…i just finished a wonderful dinner i made…and now i am ready to have a chill Sunday.

i am going to make myself an extra spicy Caesar – all in the name of health but of course.

if i am feeling like i won’t hack out my lungs tomorrow – i’ll get my Zumba on

but

based on the pictures that were taken this weekend – mamma might wanna get on the exercise train sooner than later.
yikes!

but for tonight – it shall be a Caesar, perhaps even my new low carb beer i found.  ok so it’s not so new – it’s Molson 67 – with lime.  the lime bit is the new part
i swear there is no alcohol in it tho.
and i will hopefully finish the book that Portia De Rossi wrote – Unbearable Lightness.  my feelings about this book are so all over the place i am sure there will be a blog post about that in the future.

have any of you read it?  thoughts???

enjoy your Sunday night everyone.

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it seemed like a good idea at the time

i always come up with the greatest ideas.

i heard it from someone, who heard it from someone, who heard it from someones best friends cousins husbands father…

that hula hoops were a good tool for weight loss.

so i googled it – and google said, “why yes bee, this is true”
so if google said so…well it had to be true!!!

so i thought – damn!  i used to be an amazing hula hooping kinda girl when i was like 12…
and i kick everyone’s ass on my wii virtual hula hoop
why don’t i just go buy myself a real hula hoop???

so off i went to walmart and voila – a hula hoop was purchased.

i so totally believed i would look like this:

i am woman enough to admit – that i don’t look anything like this.
not even close.
ask LB…when she gets off the floor…and stops laughing
*ahem*

anyways…i am lucky if i can get that thing to spin around my hips 3 times
i don’t look sexy, or at ease.
i look constipated…
i look like a middle aged woman having a seizure.

that hula hoop challenge on the wii gave me a false sense of super-stardom

i used to be good.
now not so much.

i have resorted to watching “how to” videos on youtube.

and i gotta say – no matter which way you slice it…bee’s got no rhythm.
oy.

i am not gonna give up.  i mean even failing at it has made me break out in a sweat…so that can’t be a bad thing.
man – where is the 12 year old me to teach me a move or 2?
meh – best she stay away – i’d hate to break a hip.

also – in my quest to find the hula hoop – i found me a trampoline.
yes – i bought myself a trampoline.
cause google said it was a kick ass work out.

it is currently in my trunk – in a million pieces.  the box says “some assembly required”

i am not too good with putting things together.  not too sure how much faith i have in myself putting that together.

i mean, this is something i will be jumping on.

it’s bad enough i see clearly how bad of an idea it is to own a trampoline when you are as accident prone as i am…
but what if i don’t put that together correctly???

how do i explain that to the doctor’s at emerg???

maybe when LB can catch her breath and get up off the floor – i’ll ask her to help me.

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