Tag Archives: doctor

the results are in

so today was the day.

the big weigh in.

it’s the very first thing i do even before i step into the room – i get on the dreaded scale.
every time i ask him if i should take my shoes off.  every time he says no.
every time i say take five pounds off the final tally
and every time he laughs – as if i kid.

i held my breath and got on…and he adjusted the weights and voila – there was my current weight.

how much do i weigh?

well i am not going to tell you that!!!

i did gain weight though.  i had a feeling that would be the outcome.
how much weight did i gain you ask?

are you ready?



0.5 pounds.

yup, i gained half a pound since last year.

to be fair…after my doctor’s appointment last year i do believe i dropped another 2 pounds.
so i’ve gained a couple of pounds.

i have basically maintained my weight for a whole year – if not longer actually.
that brings me immense pleasure, because that means i am being smart…i think i finally know how to stay on track…
even if there are a few slips along the way.

as my good friend pointed out to me – she told me to not even worry about a couple of pounds
because i’ve been doing weights for just under a year, and i was warned by my personal trainer that i would see the scale go up

and up it went.  half a pound.
half a pound!!!

i am feeling good about it 🙂

everything else about me is awesome – although i still have to get blood work done.

he wants me to get my eyes checked ASAP – he think we should rule out eye strain for my headaches
sure it’s been about 12 years since i’ve had my eyes checked but i think they are just fine!

he’s booking me an MRI – just to make sure my brain looks sexy and awesome.
he asked if i was claustrophobic
and i said oh hell yes…because i am, very much so.

the kind doctor who knows i am not into pill popping gave me a prescription for Ativan – suggested it would be a good idea to take before the MRI

also knowing that i have quite the intolerance for meds – he let out a chuckle and said i should do a test run and take a pill at home before the appointment
haha – funny man.

good thing i love him – and good thing i am so blessed to have a doctor who actually knows me and my body.

i will most certainly do a test run at home.  anyone wanna come over and get stoned with me?  my doc says it’s all good.

wordpress counter

Site Meter

getting older

i don’t mind getting older
i am actually quite enjoying it!  well, most of it.

if i could just have my 20 year old body and skin again, i would be perfect!!!

the older i get…the more my perception changes.

i see the changes in myself.  although gradual…how do you NOT change as you mature?

i know now, that i wouldn’t have spent a second of my emotions on all the stuff that seemed tragic and dark when i was younger.

i know that i am more than my waist size, and that the colour of my hair is whatever the box says it is.

i know that words like blood pressure and cholesterol and heart disease are more than just words…they are reality as you get older.

enter my doctors appointment yesterday.

i was never called with any results from my physical back in November.  No news is good news right?

well i went to see him yesterday…for a headache i have not been able to shake in 2 weeks…
and i was told that my cholesterol level was the same as the year before.

we both thought for sure, with the weight loss, working out, healthy living stuff…that it would have gone down.  it actually stayed the same.

i don’t know what the number means.  it just started to be part of my life as of last year.
my cholesterol level showed it’s face for the first time last year.
6.4 is the number.  that’s all Greek to me.
it was inevitable…i always knew that.  it’s genetic, and i have a big family…all who seem to have high cholesterol.
so i get my moms hips and my dad’s cholesterol issue.
thanks there universe 🙂

anyways…it’s nothing to panic over.  nothing at all.
he recommended a low fat diet.
low fat???  what is low fat????
i have been spoiled by my low carb life, i just could not imagine changing the way i eat.
it wouldn’t hurt to look in to it i suppose…but i feel like a kid right now…i wanna stomp my foot, yell NO…and run away.

there is room for improvement…i know this.  sometimes i take advantage of eating low carb and eat things that aren’t the healthiest for me.
i could always cut those things out…

who knew that one day i would have to worry about a number…that’s not on my scale?
not that i am worried…i just want to lower that number.

although…i’ve got “better than normal” blood pressure.
actually, perfect he said.
who knew that would make me feel so happy and relieved???

lol…as i said…i really don’t mind getting older…
but there are just some things i could really do without.

like low fat.

i don’t wanna!!

wordpress counter

Site Meter

hot mess

if you’ve come here for a good time…i say run…run while you can.
i assure you there are no rainbows beaming out of my arse today.
i am one hot mess.
a hot hormonal broken back mess
i wasn’t going to write…but i always write…right?
did you know that today is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year??
i was perfectly fine until i got into my car and ended up on the highway in complete white out conditions.
i was in a snow storm from hell..and the radio stations were dismissing it as “some snow falling”
some snow falling my ASS.  it was crazy insane…i almost got into an accident…
and by the time i got into work (just after 8am) i wanted a glass of wine…or 12
then i went on line and saw something that made me cry…so of course i blogged all about that next door.
a hot mess i tell you.
i have been pretty short as of late.  this screwed up back thing is really driving me mental.
i went to bed on Friday in tears – tears i tell you.  i was in so much pain.  popped an advil and was able to sleep.
i woke up in the morning and stretched out and my back didn’t go into spasm.  i felt like myself!!!!
until i sat up that is.
seems like an old back injury decided to flare up when i wasn’t looking.
what the hell?????
my lower back was awesome..and now my left shoulder was in pain.
ugh.  just ugh.
i managed to work out 3 times last week.  it didn’t do wonders for my back..but it made my head feel better.
but it’s obvious i am not ready to throw myself back in hard core.
so what to do??
i am going to go home and feel sorry for myself for a bit.
take a nap.
get lots of puppy kisses….
and get over it.
if the back isn’t better by the end of the week…i will go to the doctor.
ok, show of hands…who have i inspired today?

wordpress counter

Site Meter

the numbers are in


i went to the doctor yesterday armed with a list (that’s a sign that you are getting older when you walk in with a list)
everything went almost perfectly.
I do believe i am as healthy as an Ox. (How healthy is an Ox anyways?) 
My doctor was very impressed with my eating/working out and weight loss.
I do have a work out related issue – apparently an inflamed tendon.  if Advil and ice doesn’t make it go away…a shot of cortisone will.  i told him it was an issue i could live with thank you very much.  no shots for this girl.
he is pretty much confidant that my cholesterol levels will show completely normal…and that everything looks awesome (OK, he didn’t say awesome but you know what i mean)
he was pretty much impressed with me…hello…who wouldn’t be 🙂
and then the dreaded weigh in.
i looked over at him and said…remember…i don’t want to know what i weigh
just my difference in weight from last year to this year.
So of course….
he told me what i weigh!!!!
insert vomity looking emoticon here.
he told me my weight.
if you follow my blog….you would already know i am anti-scales.  I am perfectly content not knowing how much i weigh.
ignorance is bliss kind of thing.
nothing good has ever come out of knowing that information.
I am not into numbers.  I don’t want to be defined by a number.  Now that i know what i weigh…i define myself.
my name is no longer Bee – i am # blah blah blah.
Everything went running through my head.  Well the number can’t be accurate….i was wearing heavy shoes, my clothes were still on, it’s that time of the month…of course i am heavier than normal.  I work out…so i am heavier because muscle weighs more than fat. etc etc etc
every.little.thing ran through my head.
Don’t get me wrong.  the number is not bad. Not bad at all. But who is to say what number is good??
I mean it’s an individual thing right?
Needless to say…i was traumatized.  Does this now give me a reason to follow my weight on my scale at home?  will i become obsessed with the number on the digital screen?
I’ve been there before….obsessing over a number that in the end means nothing at all to me.
I ended up literally throwing that scale out of the window and never looked back.
I know that i have lost weight…i know that my sizes have gone down…i know that i feel pretty damn good.
But then there he goes throwing a number in to my brain and i have been mulling it over in my head ever since.
I felt really good up until that point.  Now i feel that maybe my decision to stop trying to lose weight needs to be reconsidered.
see what #’s do?  they are the devil.  the devil i tell you.
he’s lucky i like him…otherwise i may have just pounded him!
But – i did lose weight.  in the double digits.  double digits my friends. (excuse me while i do my happy dance!!)
Let me say to those few people that felt it necessary to tell me “oh you’ve lost at least 20 pounds.  at least” that you were not only wrong…you also gave me a complex!
Being the height that i am, i can understand why some would assume that i may have lost twenty pounds
but 5 pounds on your body would look more like 10 pounds on my body.
so there.
it’s all relative.
So i am still chewing on my thoughts about this whole number thing.  I’ve come to the conclusion that i so need to get over it.
I am doing everything right…and seeing changes.  awesome changes.  it’s just a slllllloooowwww process.
Bottom line, i started making all these changes for my health.  first and foremost.
everything else is gravy.
my doctor says i’m made of awesome.  and who am i to argue with him?
And so i ended the day making dinner for my bff and hanging out catching up.  a little too late for little ol’ me…but worth it.  totally.
And…sorry for the blog yesterday.  i was testing out a theory…and i was right. but of course 🙂
So since it’s Hump Day and i am feeling kinda randy….i thought this song would be appropriate for today.

Site Meter

the day has come


I am off to see my doctor tomorrow and i am quite excited!!

I know, who really gets excited about going to the doctor?  Apparently i do!

I am really, really curious to see what kind of results i get this time around.  It’s been since last August since i’ve seen him…almost a year and a half.
Last time i was there…was the first time i was told that my cholesterol is starting to go above normal.  just a little…but just a little is a little too much for me.
i knew the day would come…after all it’s hereditary, and so it is my god given right to blame my daddio 🙂

And then there is the whole weighing part of it i cannot wait for.  My doctor rocks my socks.  He has learned not to tell me my weight.  I can always tell by his body language if it’s good or bad anyways.

This time i will ask him what my weight difference is from last year to this year.  Not that it will really be indicative of how much i have lost, because i assure you i gained at least 5 pounds during the months of Dec-March last year for sure.  that is when my eating was totally outta control.  So i will add another 5 pounds to whatever he tells me.

I might share here, i might not…depending how shy i get about the whole thing.
yes…it’s true.  sometimes i am shy.

Anyways wish me luck!

On to other news…today (well really yesterday) is my 5 year anniversary at work.  I get a nice fancy watch for my years of service.  It’s amazing how quickly time flies.

Happy Monday kids!
Site Meter