rambles from an insomniac

it’s almost 2am…i decided to stop fooling myself and get outta bed
my puppy is laying there, oblivious to the world around her…snoring…and i gotta say i’m a little jealous.

and so i am doing what any other sensible person would do at 2:00am
i won’t be posting it until i am much more awake though 🙂

I am amazing.
just thought i’d throw that out there lol

I woke up Monday morning, after having little to no sleep…and felt pretty good considering.
i started going over my to-do list in my head…and of course the gym was on the top of the list.
i need to up my time there…lately i’ve just been running in for a cardio session and saying no to the weights

So…all day i am prepared and psyched and ready to go.
Around 2:00, i start changing my mind…
i said to myself….
self, it’s raining outside, maybe you should just go straight home
self, it’s only Monday you don’t have to go today…you have all week
self, maybe you should go home and nap.

it’s like i have a little devil on my shoulder.
i could talk myself in to and out of anything.
bad bad bee.

Anyways, i did go to the gym, despite what the voices in my head were saying
i did my weights and had a kick ass cardio session.

i notice that making deals with myself actually works.

i promised myself, that if i did 10 min extra cardio i could be rewarded with an iced coffee
since the summer dollar days are over i haven’t had one in a while.
so i did an extra 10 min and went and got me-self a bevvy.
good times!!
would i be able to reward myself with a bag of dill pickle chips the next time? lol

I don’t need a personal trainer
i need a personal motivator…someone who can remind me how it is i feel after i am done working out…or someone who will kick my ass.  i am pretty sure i know a few people who would kick my ass for free.
but anyways…the feeling after i am done working out….
dare i say…better than sex?  nah not true..but a close runner up.
i feel ahhh-maaa-zing!!
but it’s obvious i forget the feeling, because i still have to really pump myself up to go the next time!

i mean, i don’t forget how a glass of wine makes me feel…
or dill pickle chips
or a piece of chocolate…
i know exactly how those things make me feel.

so why do i forget how the gym makes me feel?  there is never a time i say…man i regret going to the gym
i always find myself saying – man, i am so glad i went.

maybe i am getting bored?  i was up the other night at some god awful hour and a Zumba infomercial came on
and it took everything i had not to order the discs
if you’ve been following my blog for a while, you would know that i’ve been wanting to take classes
my gym offers them…but just Monday mornings.  i can’t really skip work and go.
i just think that’s stupid….bah, but everything seems stupid at 2:00am.
anyways that’s where my head is at.

on to other very very important news…
i am soooooo excited.

if you know me in real life, you would know that i have a huge, crazy crush on Gavin Degraw.
i love him so much that i was even able to forgive him for his second album – which was not good (sorry gavin)
i love him.  his voice is my ear candy.  he could sing a page outta the phone book and i would still melt.
he is instant panty removal material.
not in a physical oh my lord that man is hot sense…in a when i close my eyes and hear him sing i get shivers sense

ok – sooooo my point being…his new album is out today!
i have been listening to his album on line for the past few days – and when i say album, i mean ONE song lol
on repeat – for 3 days.
i am dying to post it here…but obviously it’s not even hit youtube yet.
all i can suggest is that you all run out and get his album (which is called Sweeter) and listen to “Stealing”

“we had a good time, and then there was sorrow.  i call it stealing, you call it borrow.  so i want my heart back, if you’re not gonna keep it.  If you got no uses, then i’m gonna need it, and someone else is gonna need it too.”

wow, i really need to go to bed ehh?  good luck to me…i am so wired.

anyways since i can’t leave you with the song i am obsessed with at the moment…i will leave you with one that always makes me melt….enjoy….

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