grumpy pants

the other day i had my grumpy pants on.
not to be confused with my saggy ass pants.  no, no.  my grumpy pants are form fitting and make my ass look amazing.
but still…that’s not the point.
I am a pretty regimented person.
even typing that out makes me chuckle a little…cause really…who knew?
sure, i am a creature of habit when it comes to certain things…but typically i hate to be tied down to any specific schedule.
i normally love to fly by the seat of my pants when it comes to living my life….
but wow how i have buckled down this year.
i do much better with a specific routine and goal in mind.
it’s amazing how having specific goals have shaped me…literally 🙂
my monday – friday is clearly mapped out…and i rarely stray.
it works. 
if it works, it stays.
i was in a different place last year.  i didn’t really care about much.
i did what i did, when i did it.
not to say my life was horrible last year…but looking back…i just was not happy.
i see how much i didn’t care…about myself.
i was lacking something…i am not too sure what that something was…but there was something in me that needed fulfilling.
an emptiness…and so i filled that emptiness…mouth to stomach
which ultimately only made me unhappier…and emptier.
knowing that what i was doing to myself only made me more sick…more unhappy, more unhealthy…just didn’t matter.
fast forward to this year.
complete 180.  i have never been happier!  i have never been more content and healthy and excited about life.
and so the other day i felt this total grumpfest coming on.
i was moody…snappy.
and it dawned on me that i was pissed off that unforeseen circumstances threw a big ass wrench in my schedule.
something came up that could not be avoided that completely set back my evening.
and i was mad!
and it made me realize, this “new” me, or better version of me
enjoys the routine of it all.
it’s the routine of it all that has made me successful, happier, and filled up that thing that i was lacking.
had i known about this unforseen wrench in advance i could have adjusted my schedule, but it was just thrown at me…no time to re-route my thinking.
and if you know me at all…you know i am not too fond of being told what to do and when to do it.  i like things on my terms.
anyways it was just a realization i had.
today i am not sporting my grumpy pants…but my oh my the pants i have on today are tres sexy 🙂
have an awesome rainy tuesday!

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